


Lame Excuses

by TiroFinale



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, teen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-05-04
Updated: 2014-05-06
Packaged: 2018-01-21 21:04:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1563989
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TiroFinale/pseuds/TiroFinale
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bilbo is kinda lame, and Kili wants him</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“Hey Bilbo, aren’t you going to get in?”  
Bilbo looked up from his book, searching the pool for the body of the voice that had so rudely disrupted him from his reading. 

“No, I’ve, uh got a cold.” He replied adding a sniffle to make it more believable.

“Oh, ok then.” And before Bilbo could get a word in Kili Durin had pushed of from the wall and had propelled himself halfway across the pool.Bilbo sighed, trying in vain to get back into the book, but found that his head was too busy analysing the brief conversation. He didn’t really have a cold; if he did he would have stayed home. No, the reason for him not joining in the school trip was much more serious. In fact, Kili had something do with it. 

You see, Bilbo had been harbouring the biggest crush on the brunet. It had started the first time they had met, back in primary school. His crush had only grown through the years, as he and Kili passed through puberty. But his crush wasn’t the only thing that had grown. As they came into their teens Bilbo had grown more aware of how different his and Kili’s bodies were. Kili was tall, tan and muscular to boot. Bilbo was the complete opposite. His skin was pale, he was short, and he was chubby. As if he was going to get in the water and let Kili see his body. Kili was social, friends with everyone, all the girls swooning over him. Bilbo only had a handful of friends, and had once been asked out for a dare.

That was why he had faked the cold. It was also why he refused to register the note of disappointment in Kili’s voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully other chapters will be longer :/


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is a lot longer....

Kili Durin was not known for his subtlety. In fact, most of his relatives would say the complete opposite. He was brash, full of energy and sometimes overbearing. but he could  be charming and kind. He has grown up in a huge family house with people coming and going constantly. His most permanent family were his mother, father and his brother Fili. He and Fili had caused quite a lot of grief as children and were famous for being constantly up to no good. Kili was also famous for his huge crush on Bilbo Baggins. It had started even before they had met, his mother telling stories of her friends Belladonna and her son with the copper locks. He had fallen in love with the idea of the seemingly quiet and sweet child of his mother's lifetime friend.

 

He had been very disappointed when Bilbo didn't get into the pool. Just the thought of what could be underneath those clothes. Smooth creamy skin, soft curves. No no goddammit, he was not about to get an erection in a public swimming pool. He tried to think thoughts of his uncle Thorin when he had found the pile of rat dropping he and Fili had hidden in his bed. Kili shuddered, that had been truly terrifying. Thorin had been so red Kili had thought that the blood was going to burst out of his face. Thorin had chased him and Fili around the house for a good half an hour after that. Speaking of Fili, where was his usual partner in crime? He could have gotten out of the pool, but Kili hadn't seen him so... Before he could go looking for his brother, arms came out from underneath him and pulled him under the water. He tried to fight off the attacker, but they were too strong for him. He was pulled back up to the surface where he came face to face with none other than his brother, Fili.

 

"Oi, what was that for you dolt?" His brother grin alone told him that Fili knew what, or who he had been thinking about. How his brother had found out about his crush Kili had no idea. One day Fili had just come up to him and said, "You know, Bilbo likes you back." Of course Kili hadn't believed him, as if Bilbo would even look at a gangly loser like Kili.

 

“You know Kili, you could invite Bilbo along with us when we go to Erebor.” Kili groaned, Fili had been trying to get him to invite his crush along to their holiday house for weeks now, ever since they had learnt that they would be staying at their holiday home.

 

Erebor was a small island off the coast of Norway, with only a few small towns dotting its rocky slopes. Their uncle had inherited it when their grandfather, Thrain, had died. It was the only remains of their ancestors huge fortune that they had lost to gambling debts.

 

“Fine, if it’ll get you to shut up about it.” Kili snapped in response. He loved his brother, but he didn't want or need his help when it came to his love life.

 

“Do it before we get back to school, or I’ll do it for you.”

Before either could argue any further, they were being told to get changed and make their way to the bus. As Kili pushed himself up out of the pool, he glanced to where Bilbo had been sitting only to see Fili already there, talking to something with the younger boy. Kili was instantly suspicious, and made his way quickly over to them.

“So you see-”

“Fili! come on, or we’ll both be late!” Fili turned and smirked at him, turning back to Bilbo quickly, before jogging over to where Kili stood.

“Remember, before we get back to school.” He said, A little too smugly for kili’s liking.

 

They made their way to the changing room, where they changed back into their clothes. For some reason their school had a mufti policy when on school trips (which Kili thought was stupid, but he wasn’t about to question their principal, Mr. Grey) so he changed into a dark blue long sleeved top, with black skinny jeans. He pulled his hair back into a loose ponytail, securing it with a black hair tie.

 

“Come on Kili, hurry up.” He turned to his brother, and gestured to his shoes, still on the bench next to him.

“Go on without me if you’re so desperate to get going.” He said, reaching for his socks. He heard Fili shoes slapping against the tiles of the changing room. He finished tying his shoes and made his way out to the front of the building, where the bus the school had hired was waiting.

 

He was the last on, and by some miracle, the bus just had enough seats for everyone to have their own. He looked for his brother, but found that the only seat free was next to, oh look at that, Bilbo. As kili walked down the aisle towards his seat, he couldn't help but think how Fili probably planned for this to happen. He sat down and turned to Bilbo, who was staring out the window, and hadn’t yet realised that someone had filled the space next to him.

“Hey Bilbo.”

“Oh, hey Kili.” A small silence stretched between them, and Kili winced at the awkwardness.

“So, uh, what was Fili talking to you about?” Bilbo look surprised, turning to properly face Kili.

“He was inviting me to Erebor with you guys, but he said you had told him to.”

Kili mentally cursed Fili, he had said that he would let Kili do it!

“Is there something wrong with that?” Bilbo look at him with a slightly hurt look, he had probably seen the anger on Kili’s face.

“Oh! Uh, no, it’s just I was going to do it..” Another small silence.

“So, do you think you’ll come?”

Well, I could, but I wouldn't want to be a burden to you guys, and aren’t you going with family?” Kili snorted, and Biblo look up at him confusedly.

“No sorry. It’s just, I think most of my family already love you more than me, and they haven't even met you.” Bilbo let a short bark of laughter escape his mouth, before covering it with a hand, his shoulders shaking with suppressed laughter. Kili smiled, feeling a small sense of achievement at making his friend laugh.

 

The conversation carried on in simpler topics all the way back to the school where they said goodbye to each other, Bilbo promising to think about Erebor.   

 

                                 _______________

 

When Kili arrived home, he threw his bag down in the hallway and toed of his shoes. He was about to run upstairs to his room when he heard his mother calling for him. He found her in the kitchen, cooking what looked like to be lasagne.

“Yes mum?”

Did you ask Bilbo if he wants to come to Erebor with us?” She said, without turning away from her cooking. Kili groaned, and slumped down on to one of the chairs around the dining table.

“Not you too.” He whined, throwing his head back to rest on the back of the chair.

“What? Hes a perfectly fine person to have a crush on.” Kili jerked forward in his chair.

“You know about that?! Since when?!” His mother turned to him with a gentle look on her face.

“Kili, I’ve know for years now.” She said, with a kind note in her voice.

“Wait, so all those times I asked you to tell me about him..?”

“Yes, you were rather obvious about it all. So, did you ask him?”

“Yeah, he said he’d think about it.” She turned back to the mince simmering on the old stove.

“Well, in that case, go upstairs and finish off your homework, I know you’ve got maths.” He sighed and dutifully stood to his feet.

“Yes mum.” He turned out of the room and slowly dragged himself upstairs with thoughts spinning around in his head. He flopped down onto his bd and picked up his phone. He had one unread message from Bilbo.

 

‘Hi, just confirming I can come to Erebor’

BB

 

Kili smiled and buried his face into his pillow. Maybe this wouldn't be too bad...

  
  


 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so I did this quite late at night so I'm sorry for any mistakes. And any mistakes are my own, this work hasn't been beta'd.  
> Again any constructive feedback is very welcome!

**Author's Note:**

> I dont know what this is either.. I will probs put more chapters up but it will be slow and any Constructive criticism is very welcome!


End file.
